Live life, help life, and most of all, respect life for what it is. Life won't last forever, but long enough to have children, for them to have children, and plenty more for the world to be mostly full. Your should go with the good side of life, rather then the bad.
Life is better when you follow these rules: Effort, Etiquette, Sincerity, Character, and Self-control. If someone special to you died, they are better to be up there, where they don't have to go through all the pain they put into seeing you one last time. Just like Lucky who used to be our dog... It's better if you defend your self from robbers and other bad people to help you move on in life. A life cycle is a definition of what an animal goes through during it's lifetime. Birds go from the egg, to the chick, to the adult. Amphibians go from the egg, to the larva, to the adult. Plants go from the seed, to the seedling , to the flowering plant. Insect go from the egg, to the larva, to the pupa, to the adult. Even a human has a life cycle. A human goes from a baby, then a toddler, then an older child, then a teenager, then an adult, and finally you marry someone. I'm not sure if marrying someone is part of the life cycle, but anyway, you get the idea. Ashleigh
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Holy crap, guys! When I talk about life speeding up as you get older... I'm not kidding. It's been about two weeks since I've had time to sit and do some writing (possibly more, but let's not discuss that) and life has been keeping me busy as sin. I started driver's ed about a week and a half ago, and the homework, classwork, and driving time from that has been keeping me quite occupied. When I'm not busy with driver's ed, I'm wrestling with my schoolwork and trying to keep all of my instructors satisfied. So far, my lowest grade is a 96 or 97- so I think I'm keeping track of that decently. At this rate, I'm more concerned with speeding up my pace. I'm going to have a very busy December, since everything should slow up a bit then. I'll finish driver's ed, but I'll also earn my Sensei title and won't have to worry about keeping dojo hours up as much.
This week, I'm aiming to catch up on some of my schoolwork that I missed doing last week. There was a power/internet outage due to a heavy rainstorm that took down wires all throughout my town for 3 or 4 days, and that affected my work-flow since my dad and I both had to travel a town over to use library wifi. To my credit, I did write a 3-page essay for my Biology class that I scored a 100% on... so there's something to be said about changing your environment around if you have the opportunity to when you work. I think that if I was less stressed about the internet/power situation, I would've been able to accomplish even more while at the library. It's a comfortable (and mostly quiet) environment that I wouldn't mind working in again. That aside, today I was able to have some much-needed "me time". Funny words from a 16 year old, right? My hair has been needing a trim for awhile now, as the ends were damaged from the bleaching I did last year to achieve my blue and purple hair. Since the girl who does my nails for me is also a hairdresser, I booked the two appointments for the same day and ended up at the salon from 12:00pm until about 2:15. My hair is now trimmed with no more split ends and dead tips, and my nails got patched up and re-done with a beautiful red color (pictured below). While my nails were being painted, Shelby (the nail tech) and I ended up talking about different methods of brow-care- and I found out that she could wax my brows, too. After a 30 minute pep-talk, she was able to convince me and I decided that I'd give waxing a try. Keep in mind, I've been told horror stories about waxing before. Some of my friends have incredibly low pain tolerance, so they had warned me against doing it because it was apparently excruciatingly painful. I tend to have a high pain tolerance, so I didn't think the experience would be unbearable... and it wasn't. I'd compare it to ripping a bandaid off of your arm. The pain was barely there, and a cooling gel got applied after the fact to soothe my skin a little. For the small, tiny amount of pain that there was, my brows are now tidy and look better than they ever have. The small under-hairs have always really bothered me, so looking at myself in the mirror and having them absent is truly refreshing to me. I got home about an hour or so ago, and wound up using one of my charcoal face masks with my little sister to completely freshen my skin up. I don't use them often- maybe once a month, so it was nice to steam my face and then let the mask soften my skin. I use a bubble mask, which puffs up and washes away easily without any pain. My sister likes it because it tickles as it works and doesn't peel off like most of my other masks do. I must say, it does painlessly have the same effect as the masks that cling into your pores. My skin is now baby soft, and an additional bonus is that I got to spend time with my sister making a late lunch and talking while our masks dried. Once everything was washed off and lunch was finished, Ashleigh went back to do her schoolwork and I came upstairs to write this post... and there really isn't much more to this update than that! I'm sure my sister's writing about various subjects has been keeping you at least mildly entertained while my dad and I are caught up with life and absent from the blog. I'm going to be trying for at least 2 posts a week from here on out. Writing on a daily basis is refreshing- but currently hard to maintain for me as I come closer to some large milestones in my life. Thank you for bearing with me during this time. - Maddie P.S. - My nails are done by Shelby Racine at the Added Touch Salon in Rindge, NH. She's one of the nicest and most bubbly people I know, and she does INCREDIBLE nail art. I strongly recommend her if you're in the area :) We got a new car. It is a red 1972 Buick Centurion. It is old, and it has a top that can be put down. When we bought it, it was loud because it had a hole in its exhaust and it needed fixing. We took it to a mechanic and it needed exhaust manifolds. Because it was an old car, no one made manifolds for it any more. My Dad had to find some old ones to put on the car. Two or three weeks later, our car was back and a lot less noisy! The car was shining. Last week, we took the car to my karate tournament in Franconia, New Hampshire. My Aunt Michelle came up to see me in it. She let me play on her phone on the way. We had a good time. At the tournament I won two 1st places and one 3rd place. After the tournament, we went to McDonald's. The line was so big, and we ate at a picnic table outside. The line was also too big to get an ice-cream-cone after lunch. When we left, I fell into a deep sleep. I slept for hours!. Then I woke up... After leaving McDonald's, we went for a drive on the Kancamagus Highway. It is one of the most scenic highways in New England. We saw the coolest thing. Well, my Dad and Aunt did. I slept through it. A picture of what they saw is above. THE MOUNTAINS! For the rest of the ride I was in a big deep sleep and didn't get up until we were home. My Dad and Aunt loved their ride in the convertible. The rest of us slept through the entire ride. It is much windier in the back of the car and my hair got messy. Next time, I want to sit in front!
Ashleigh This quote comes from the poet and author Atticus Finch (who I'd honestly love to do a quote collection post about), and I found it while looking through quotes to post underneath one of my Instagram photos. While the quote seems to be in a descriptive form of someone, I like the metaphor it aims to convey- that metaphor being that while you may have a fear of moving forward in life or making big decisions that can affect your life, it can be just as scary (if not scarier) to perpetually stay still and not move forward in life.
If you've read this blog before, you likely know that life progression is something often discussed by my dad and I. My dad endorses people setting goals and striving to reach them, while I tend to encourage people to never stop learning and choosing to learn. In any case, I like this quote because of its similarity to our own message of not being afraid to make a change in your life to strive for something you've wanted. While I'm still young to make big decisions and take chances that'll drastically affect my future, I can certainly say that I hate "staying still" or not progressing forward in my life. I'm constantly moving and constantly changing- just not in a way that'll change my near future too greatly. Obviously, my choices and changes will amount to who I am in the long run, but it's not necessarily a near-term change. Recent changes I've made to my life include a smaller friend circle, higher work-load, and more time spent volunteering at my karate school. I wasn't happy with the drama and negativity in my life, or really the people I was spending time with... so I made the change and cut back my circle of friends to people who I love and am comfortable being myself with. I'm aiming to achieve an Associate's Degree when I graduate in 2019, so obviously, my workload needed to be raised. This was a necessary change that will end up eventually shaping my future, but I sincerely believe it's for the better. Finally, I'll be testing for my Sensei title in December- a huge step for me in my karate life and something I've wanted for a long time. The extra time spent in the dojo is not only necessary for my title, but also something I love doing- while I still get a little flustered in front of large classes, I love being able to help people one-on-one and I enjoy teaching people new things that'll help their form or technique. These choices and changes are big for me, right now. In 10 years, will it matter if I cut back my friend circle? Well, maybe. Who I choose to associate myself with could have a huge impact on who I become in life. Adding extra time to focus on my education is also vital to where I'll be in 10 years... and finally, acquiring that sensei title is something that will never expire or fade away for me. While the choices I make now may pale in comparison to the choices I might make as an adult, they are in no way any less important because they are stones in the path leading to my adulthood. I am not afraid of heights... and I'm already beginning to fly. It's never too early (or too late) to make a choice, make a change, that can affect your future for the better. - Maddie I close my eyes, Only for a moment, And the moment's gone... All my dreams, Pass before my eyes, a curiosity. Dust in the wind, All they are is dust in the wind. Same old song, Just a drop of water, In an endless sea. All we do, Crumbles to the ground Though we refuse to see. Dust in the wind, All we are is dust in the wind... Now, don't hang on, Nothing lasts forever but the immense sky. It slips away, And all your money won't another minute buy. Dust in the wind, All we are is dust in the wind. Dust in the wind, Everything is dust in the wind. That song by the band Kansas always reminds me how fleeting our lives are. Always remember to tell the people you love that you love them, because you never know when the last time you see them will be. If you love someone, let them know it... not just through your words, but through your actions as well. Call them up to say hello, or stop by and take them to lunch. Treat people as you want yourself to be treated and you will get through life with few regrets in that regard, Because in the end, all we are IS dust in the wind. I was searching for prompts today and I came across an interesting question-based prompt that I'd like to take a moment to address. The question (if you haven't already guessed) is if you could either have a pause or rewind button for your life, which would you choose and why? My choice would be neither, personally- but that's because logical thinking entirely discounts this prompt for me. Instead, I'd like to talk rationally about the two choices offered and why I'd rather just live.
Let's start with rewind. Having a rewind button for your life seems to be the obvious choice of the two, right? You'd be able to go backwards and fix your mistakes, or talk to a loved one who passed away, or better use your time... you may even be able to prevent a crisis from happening! However, when you think about the situation and take a rewind button for what it is, you wouldn't necessarily have memory of using the rewind. Much like rewinding a VHS tape doesn't change the movie it plays, rewinding your life wouldn't grant you the ability to make new decisions. You'd simply be re-living your past choices up until the point you started rewinding, and to me, re-living my life sounds like more of a nightmare than a dream. Even if this button came with the perk of decision-altering, I still wouldn't want to use it. My choices have inevitably made me who I am today, and I'd never want to sacrifice the life I'm living now and all the effort I've put into it for anything else. Now let's visit the pause button. Why anyone would ever want to pause their life is beyond me. You never can know when a precious moment is going to happen until after the fact, so it isn't like you'd be able to pause a good moment and enjoy it forever anyway. That would fall to the rewind button. This button is also vague- when we say "pause life", does that mean the world around us comes to a halt, and we're allowed to keep moving? Or do we simply freeze in age and productivity- or worse yet, freeze altogether? If that's the case, I'd definitely steer clear of this button. Hit it once, and you'll never be able to un-pause yourself! And even if the pause button was referring to life's daily events, I still wouldn't choose this button. Enough people get caught in the loop of their everyday lives without having a button to do it for them. To summarize- I believe this is a foolish prompt, particularly for logical people and experienced writers. It poses a complex question that really has no good answer- and that's why I wanted to give my thoughts on it here. - Maddie Hello, and apologies for the break I took from writing last week! It was my first week settling in with all of my courses for the first half of my school year, so my schedule was a bit thrown off as I was trying to figure out how I'd set up my schedule for the year. In the first half of the year, I've been saddled with Biology, Algebra II, Intro to Communications, American Politics, English Composition I, and starting in November, Intro to Criminal Justice.
Three of those five courses are college courses, with heavier workloads and a lot more reading than your average high school class. However, I find them to be easier- because even though the work I'm doing is more advanced, there's less of it. An average high school VLACs course has about 60-65 assignments. An average SNHU course has 20-30 assignments. The SNHU courses are shorter, and I appreciate it. My hardest course so far is Algebra II- and not just because I absolutely despise mathematics. There are approximately 130 assignments to complete, and even though they're mostly in the form of quizzes... it's a bit of an overload. So, I spent last week submitting bunches of assignments, PARTICULARLY for Algebra, to try and get ahead of what I know will be a busy schedule. In my first week I've already had a heavy workload, and in a few months I'll be adding another course. I need to be ready for the overlap of work. However, last week was the only exception to my lack of blog posts and I'll be on top of them from here on out. The following few will likely be on the side-blog (The Letters) and will be following the prompt challenge I'm doing. Thanks for the understanding, Maddie This quote is such a honest metaphor for people who refuse to make progress in their life. I see examples of this everywhere in my life... friends claiming they've made progress toward becoming a better and healthier person when they've only taken one step and then stayed in place, people saying they're going to strive towards goals and then refusing to push themselves and progress... everyone says they'll try for something, but then they get comfortable with where they are and stop pushing themselves to go further.
I've always been taught that you are never too old to stop learning new things, and that you're never too old to stop trying. When I say I'm going to change, I throw everything I have into it... and I try to not quit until I've reached my goal. That's why I've climbed Mt. Monadnock 5 times now. That's why my lowest grade is a 95. That's why I'm a second degree black belt. Speaking of karate, karate is a perfect example of this "phenomenon". So many people take karate until they reach black belt... and then feel validated to drop out. They've attained their goal, so it no longer matters or is important to them. They leave and then saunter about for the rest of their days claiming they're a black belt. There are people who have been gone for years who still say they are, though they haven't practiced or came to class in ages... and while this doesn't deprive them of the title they fought to earn, it does deprive them of the application, fitness, and knowledge that they gained from their training. It's so sad to see people's talent go to waste. At the end of the day, this quote is telling you to shoot for your goals and to follow through with them. Don't reach a milestone and get comfortable or quit... because the moment you do, you're giving up on your goal in its entirety. Sure, you may not be as bad as you were before- but you still aren't where you set out to be. It's like climbing a mountain, and then getting halfway up and deciding to build a house and live there instead of actually completing the hike. Shoot for your goals, and finish them. Even the smallest of steps count, so long as they are in the right direction. - Maddie We have a white car that was broken for a long time. Daddy had to call the mechanic and get it fixed. He did not call for a long time because he had a lot of work. So one day when he did not have a lot of work, he did call the mechanic and they came and towed the car away.. They took the car and fixed it.
Now, the car is back! I am so happy to see the White Car again. I am going to ride in it today. I am also going to bring some of my toys along. I am so happy! Ashleigh Yesterday I got a job. The Job was to clean dishes. At the end of the week I will get ten dollars. Then I will clean the dishes again and get ten dollars. It is really easy.
Last night Daddy sowed me how to do all of that. He is a real good Daddy. I got the idea of a job from my sister. Yesterday she was waking in the little oafs and Daddy gives her twenty dollars. Then I wanted to make some money too. So I asked him if I code have a job. He said OK. That is the big job I had to do. Ashleigh I have a lot of things that I like to do. I really like to play with Daddy a lot. I also like to play with my sister. Sometimes she does not want to play with me, but other times she does. Most of the time, me, my sister Maddie and her boyfriend Seth watch a movie or something.
Neema likes to play with me as well. One time in her room she won 5 card games, and I won none. That was a long time ago, when I was six. Wednesday was my birthday, so I am seven now. Asheigh Today has brought me to the realization that I really hate today's TV shows. Don't get me wrong, I've always been not too keen on the idea of wasting away in front of the idiot box- but as I sit in a hospital waiting room it's being drilled into my head that I really can't take it.
I had to accompany my grandmother to her doctor's appointment and not wanting to follow her in, opted for the waiting room. Had I realized a small child was going to walk in about 45 seconds later, I would've chosen to go in with her. The child's arrival cued the secretary to turn on the television which had previously been off... and thus my torture has begun. I don't understand how so many people enjoy TV. You could just as easily read a book or even play a video game- neither of which have been scientifically proven to drop your IQ and make your attention span shorter. Actually, studies have proven that video games (particularly first person shooters) increase awareness and attention span and even peripheral vision. On top of this, watching the tv show I am currently just shows me why today's children can be such little snots. The TV show seems to be going out of its way to display and even promote bad behavior and throwing in automated laughs every other minute to make it seem amusing. I don't know about you, but I'm not laughing. I've seen the negative effects that too much TV have on younger children and I've made the choice to live without it. - maddie “Can you remember who you were, before the world told you who you should be?” That's a quote by Charles Bukowski. I thought of it when I saw the picture of the sculpture that was at one of the Burning Man festivals. Although the quote isn't an exact match for the image, it is what I thought of.
Bukowski, by the way, was an American author and poet. He had a long career, and had a lot of his poetry published during his lifetime. I can't point to any one work that he is best known for. I guess Post Office would be it though. Meanwhile, the sculpture is by Aleksandr Milov from the Ukraine. At least that is what the picture credit says... that might be the photographer for all I know. Either way, I think the sculpture is very expressive. When I was young, I looked at things as a child. All my thoughts and dreams were idylic. I saw the good without the bad, and the how of a matter never entered my mind. Imagining my future as a house with a white picket fence, a beautiful wife greeting me at the door and a huge smile on my face, wasn't too far from how I was picturing my future. As I grew, the picture expanded to include a job I actually enjoyed and a train ride daily that was pleasant and allowed me to look at beautiful scenery. It didn't phase me that the scenery outside the train window was already bleak, and that I would later be riding right by that same scenery. My mind never made the leap. As I got older, the reality of life started to sink in. I had a nice house, but I had to work hard and spend lots to get it how I wanted. I had a beautiful wife, but she had problems that affected our relationship. To say that my life wasn't going exactly as planned was an understatement. I remembered who I was before the world changed me, though, and began to make changes to make myself become whole. We moved to another nice house in a beautiful state. My wife continued to try and battle her demons. When I stepped outside the house, I had the beauty that I always dreamed of. For a few minutes each day, I had the dream! A lot happened in the next eight years that changed my life forever. A divorce, a failed business, and my wife's early demise all hammered at me. Meanwhile, my daughters and I were making do and slowly recovering from the negatives. My life is slowly merging back towards who I was. I now remember who I was, and I am working my way back towards him. My honor is intact, and I am doing my best to be who I need to be. The world will just have to accept me for who I am. So who am I? I am a loving father for my daughters. I am a martial artist. I am a thinker, and a lover of beauty. Time is a precious gift, and I am looking to give my time to my daughters. What I write on this blog is for them. Hopefully, they can learn something from my thoughts, and never forget who they are, or what they want to be. Stay true to yourselves, and you will be happier. I like a lot of animals. I like horses, cats, leopards, dogs, ducks, deer, dolphins, sheep, and bunnies.
I like a lot of foods too. I like fruit, cheese, eggless omlet, gum, lemons, and pasta. My favorite toys are: Rose, Snow, Goggles, Fluffy, Sequin, Pinkie pie, and Princess Minnie. My favorite color is pink. My favorite movie is Tom, and Jerry. Finally my favorite zoo animal is a Zebra. Ashleigh "An absence of tears is not the same as an absence of feeling." Okay, so this is a bastardized quote by me! It is bastardized because the quote I was looking at was: "But the absence of tears wasn't the same as an absence of feeling." They are very close, so I will give credit to Lisa Kleypas for this one. Lisa is a best-selling author of romance novels. I have never read any of her work, it is not really a genre I follow. Even so, her quote inspired my thought.
The above quote sort of fits my mood over the past few days. This mood hits me every once in a while, particularly around the holidays. It's a feeling of not really sadness but emptiness. For me, absence is as much an emotional state as sad or happy. In fact, absence to me is like the lack of any real emotion. I am not happy, sad, satisfied, or unsatisfied. I'm not angry, frustrated, optimistic, or pessimistic. In fact, it just seems that everything is gray. Nothing is good enough or bad enough to elicit a response. Three things seem to drive this feeling in me. First and foremost, things that remind me about my wife. Sometimes, I just can't seem to get past that she is dead and that I won't be seeing her again. I'll hear something that reminds me of her, or smell something. Sometimes it's just a memory or something that I remember seeing with her. The holidays also seem to drive this feeling in me. At times, I feel joyless and just want to hide. I want my daughters to enjoy the holidays and have a good time... and I try to make sure they do so. But oftentimes, underneath my veneer of mirth and joy, I feel empty. It is far worse than feeling sad. Finally, the last thing that makes me feel absence is when I am not actively working towards my goals. Oftentimes, I will bury myself with projects when I am in absence mode to keep myself too busy to think. I will work on a number of goals all at once so that no one feels neglected or excluded. It's at these times that I need everyone I love to be involved for at least a little while each week. Time to spend with my family helps me to slowly kill the absence that I feel inside. Things to do, memories to make... Talks of inconsequential things, all of these are some of my favorite things! Am I nuts? Who knows. Do you experience the emotion I call absence? If so, how do you beat it? Leave me a comment if you have any ideas, because it really does suck. I just finished reading a post my dad recently wrote about teaching your children- while also teaching yourself. I liked it a lot because he's absolutely right- a lot of who I am is based off of who he is since he's the most influential person in my life. In fact, most of my personality surrounds how I've been raised and I wanted to take this post to bullet point the things that make me who I am- that I've inherited from my dad.
* My sense of humor. While my dad does tend to lean more on puns and movie lines than I do, the distorted reflection has left me with quoting Internet memes to amuse my friends and dry sarcasm paired with strong opinions. * Logic. Oh god, logic. Something I didn't fully grasp and still wouldn't say I've entirely grasped until recently, but a vital piece of my personality that my dad taught me. However, I am more emotional than my dad since if someone fails to see logic the first time; I get annoyed. * Peace over power. While primarily taught by karate, my dad has really instilled this little saying into me so that it is a part of who I am. As a martial artist you are taught to never start fights, only finish them- and I try to apply this mantra wherever I can in my life. * It is rain that grows flowers, not thunder... essentially, raise your words and not your voice. Volume will not win you any arguments, so it's better to avoid yelling altogether. While I'm still struggling a little with this; for the most part I'm level headed when it comes to arguing. * It's the little things that count. This needs no elaboration really... it is what it is. My dad has given me a deep appreciation for the small things in life, particularly in nature. * Noticing everything. I'm extremely observant, something I've learned from my dad over time. Going back to humor, most of my dad's revolves around noticing things going on around him and turning them into jokes. To understand his humor, I learned to be observant and it now aids me in my humor as well. * "Colorful" language... my dad mentioned this in his post, but my language is also inherited from him. Can't be from anywhere else really; everyone else in my family is against it! While I know there are far more ways I'm similar to my dad; these are some of the main ones. I've also inherited an awesome taste in music from my dad- something that didn't need to be on the bullet list, but that I definitely appreciate! It's nice to have a dad who enjoys heavy metal concerts as much as I do. Thank you dad- for everything. - maddie In the morning I get out of bed, go downstairs, and eat breakfast. Then I go upstairs and get dressed. Later, I go downstairs again and do my IXL. I'll eat lunch, play, do my blog, and do my math too. Then we eat dinner. After dinner, I play Xbox with Maddie and Daddy before I go to bed. In the morning, I do the same things all over again.
On Saturdays I do different things. I go to the movies with Daddy on Saturday. I color and do other things like that. Sometimes, I even help my Grandma make dinner. She likes to play ''GO FISH'' with me. And the last time we played she won five times! Asheigh I'm incredibly sleepy right now, regardless of it being the middle of the day. I was woken up early and I've been on and off sleeping all day. However, I do want to get some blogs out since I'm currently behind a day, and upon pondering for awhile I decided to search for quotes about the stars! One thing I love about where I live is the fact that on clear nights, you can walk outside and have a gorgeous view of most of the sky. The stars are inumerable and I love it. Some of my best memories, both with friends and family, have occurred while looking up at the stars. I just wish there were more people who took the time to appreciate them, rather than just saying that they're the type of person that loves watching the stars. There's a major difference.
"If people sat outside and looked at the stars each night, I'll bet they'd live a lot differently. When you look into infinity, you realize that there are more important things than what people do all day." "We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." "There wouldn't be a sky full of stars if we were all meant to wish on the same one." "Only in the darkness can you see the stars." "I don't want someone who promises me the moon and stars. I want someone who promises to lay out on the grass and watch them with me." "Though my soul may set in darkness, it will rise in perfect light, I have loved the stars too fondly to be fearful of the night." "We must unlearn the constellations to see the stars." "They witnessed her destruction, they were left to wonder why, she saw nothing but the darkness, though the stars shone in her eyes. But maybe they'd forgotten, when they failed to see the cracks, that a star's light shines the brightest, when it's starting to collapse." - Maddie Guess what? We had our first snow today. It lasted for about 1 hour. and then it turned to rain. A little later, it turned back into snow. I was so surprised when I saw the snow! I didn't know it started in October. It did not stick though. I like to think about building a snow man, and throwing snow balls! Winter is one of my favorite seasons.
Ashleigh Guess what? I have a big surprise for you! But I'm not going to tell you what it is. Here are a few hints. It is in your mouth, you eat with them, and they always stay in your mouth. The big surprises is my teeth, two of them came out! And even better, adult teeth are coming in! There is one more surprise for you. My second tooth came out this morning.
Ashleigh |
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